The Secret to Great Leadership: It Starts with Me
I want to tell you a story about a determined young woman who longed to make a real impact in her world. She had big dreams of leading others, inspiring change, and making a difference. But despite her passion, she felt stuck, unsure of where to begin.
She decided to seek out guidance and my information on the internet led her to me, eager to learn how to lead with influence.
“How can I become the kind of leader that others will follow?” was her question and goal.
The first concept I introduced to her, was that “Leadership isn’t about a title or position—it’s about influence. And influence begins with the hardest person you’ll ever lead: yourself. If you want to be a great leader, you must first master the art of personal leadership. Before you can inspire, guide, and influence others, you must develop the discipline, vision, and character that make you worth following.”
3 Ways to Lead Yourself First
1. Take Ownership of Your Growth
Great leaders don’t wait for opportunities to grow—they create them. I encouraged her to invest in her personal development by reading, reflecting, and surrounding herself with people who challenge and inspire her. True leadership starts with a commitment to learning and growth. Who are you becoming in the process?
2. Lead with Integrity
People follow leaders they trust. If your words, actions, and values don’t align, your influence weakens. I guided her through self-awareness exercises, helping her define what she stands for and how she can embody her values in every decision she makes. Are you leading by example even when no one is watching?
3. Manage Yourself Before Managing Others
Self-discipline is the foundation of effective leadership. I worked with her on time management, emotional intelligence, and setting clear priorities. If you’re unfocused, overwhelmed, or inconsistent, those around you will mirror that energy. What daily habits are shaping the leader you want to be?
As we worked together, she began to see the power of personal leadership. She became more confident, intentional, and self-aware. She no longer waited for leadership opportunities—she became the leader. And as her personal growth deepened, people naturally started looking to her for guidance, inspiration, and direction.
This is the essence of leadership. It’s not about commanding—it’s about becoming. When you lead yourself well, your influence expands, your impact deepens, and your leadership becomes something people trust and willingly follow.
She came to me wanting to lead others. In the end, she learned the most powerful truth of all: Leadership starts within.